Confessions of a recovering perfectionist 2: trying to find my inner balance

10 Apr 2016 | 0 comments

I came across this quote a while back: “If you cannot find peace within yourself, you will never find it anywhere else.” -Marvin Gaye It hit me like a lightning bolt. I have spent years, on and off, doing yoga and meditation and reading self-help books (or thinking about doing all those things) to calm […]

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Self-care toolbox #1: Parenting yourself

14 Mar 2016 | 0 comments

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On wednesdays there is no-school for the little one and half-day for the older one.

So, we're creating content and #momentsofmagic. ♥️ There may be some wrestling on the couch in between scenes too while I'm posting this. 🤷

#momlife #workingmom #momofboys #solopreneur #workonyourterms #familytime #coach #coachforfamilies #coachformoms

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First frost in the south of France and Smurfette is freezing her ass off.
What's the temperature where you are?

#bordeauxexpats #feelslikewinter

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Sometimes you just need to hide your head and breathe.

#kidsyoga #funyoga #deepbreaths #meditation

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Gratitude Day 17:
Homemade cakes 🍰 and boys who cook then for me. 🤗

Went to visit a friend/colleague in the hospital and the boys didn't want to go.

So, they offered to make zucchini bread while Sean and I went.
I wish I could send you all a piece! It's delicious and they even took it up a notch by adding some Nutella before they put it in the oven! Because you can never go wrong with 🍫. They've clearly learned a lot from watching @jacquestorres on @nailedit. 📺

And big thanks to @frenchifiedforlife for checking in on them and the 🏠. #momentsofmagic #momofboys #homemade #kidmade #cakesofinstagram #expatlife

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Gratitude Day 15 (posted a day late): On our weekly nature walk yesterday with my class of 6-11 year olds, we walked passed an empty paddock.

Within seconds, we saw ears appear over the hill. Which were attached to a head, then a body and then more bodies and ears as, one by one, the herd approached us. 🐴🐴🐴 And walked straight up to the kids.

These kids, many of whom struggle with various degrees of hyperactivity and anxiety, we're instantly calmed by the horses. It was magical to watch. 😍

Grateful to be a witness to this interaction. ♥️ #gratitude #gratitudechallenge #nature #horses #animalspirits #animaltherapy #englishteacher #yogateacher #kidsyoga #mindfulness

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You never know what you'll find in the forest.
Happy Friday!

#naturewalks #lookaround #smile

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Gratitude challenge day 14:
I've been a closet #parrothead ever since I spent my first summer living on a sailboat in the caribbean. Our skipper would wake us up every morning to Cheeseburger in Paradise.
My high school yearbook quote was a line from Changes in Latitude and we got to see @jimmybuffett play in Paris last year and it was, honestly, one of the best concerts I've ever been to.

And having a 🍹 at Margaritaville when we were in Orlando a few weeks ago was a bucket list moment.
So, on day 14 of my #gratitudechallenge, I'm entirely own my gratitude for t-shirts that simultaneously make you laugh and feel warm and nostalgic. 👕

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#gratitudechallenge Day 13:
Like most women, I have a love-hate relationship with my body and I've spent lots of time and wasted lots of energy thinking about it.

Our society and culture raises the bar and set ridiculous standards that 95% of us will never achieve.
As a #geneticcounselor, I've sat with clients and held space for them as they searched for and grieved over altered genes in their body or their child's body and the related health problems.

We've talked about how they have so much to offer the world.

As a #yogateacher, I teach my clients about anatomy and creating a practice that connects them with their body. To notice the differences before and after a posture, from one day to the next.
We've celebrated as they've developed their strength and balance to hold a posture for longer or without falling over.

As a #mindset #coach, I talk to my clients about ways to reduce the stress, frustration, and exhaustion that comes with having to juggle so many things. I encourage them to #begentle and #bepatient and #becompassionate with themselves as we would with their best friends and family members.
And, yet, to be honest, I don't always practice what I preach. And, when I don't practice it, let me tell you, my inner critic can be a really big witch!
On the yoga mat, she points out my scars and aches and pains and imperfections in my alignment.
As a parent, she criticizes when I lose my patience or forget to buy the kind of noodles they life.

As a short woman, she curses my short stature genes when I can't reach a bowl on the top shelf even with a step stool.

But, this month, I've committed to practicing #gratitude daily and I've been sharing my daily musings for accountability on my business page.
Today I am grateful that, despite my inner critic's best efforts, I can still honestly say that I am grateful for my strong and resilient body.
And I trust that, with patience and compassion, that resilience and strength will be able to silence that inner critic.
That inner critic named Marcia- because she's not me.

Does your inner critic have a name?

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One of my friends and kick-ass business coach, Lindsey Gomez, taught me a system for keeping my inbox clear of new messages.

So the icon on my phone doesn't scream that I have 99+ messages.

And, so, when I go into my inbox, my anxiety doesn't hit 11 and make me want to jump out of my skin.

The trick: create a folder called "incoming" and filter all the messages there. Then transfer only the important, to-do messages to the inbox manually as you have time to tackle them.

And it's working!

Except, between school holidays and too many newsletter subscriptions, my "incoming" box is now filling up.
So, step 2: setting a timer and working through to clear it up a bit.
Ideally, i'd love for it to only take 30 mins but I'm not there yet. I let it go too long so I'm giving myself a few sessions over a few days to sort it out.

It's a process and sometimes I fall off the wagon. But it feels so much easier to handle because my anxiety is at a 5 instead of 11.

I'm making a game of it too.
How many MB of space I will clear up from going through the 487 emails?
Wanna play along? Post your guess in the comment below and I'll send you a gift if you're closest!

Also, do you have a system for organizing your inbox? I'd love to hear it!

#solopreneur #workingmom #busymom #solutionsthatwork #successyourway #declutter #adminday #gentleandpatient #mindset #strategy #findthefun #gamification

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I took my older son to a friend's house today. She has 5 cats. "Do you like cats?" she asked.
"Not really." he replied.

Then one of her cats walked into the room, sat down near his feet and meowed. He reached out to let her sniff his hand.

The cat jumped on the couch. He reached out to pat her.

The cat purred. And the rest is history.

#animalsheal #newexperiences #newfriends

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Saturdays are family time. Which, as an extrovert, totally boosts my energy level and, fills my heart.
This type of family time feels like self-care time.
This morning, when my 8 yo asked to try out a video he saw on @beardedscienceguy... #SelfcareSaturday = #ScienceSaturday

Capillary action edition! ⚗️⚗️⚗️
👨‍👩‍👦‍👦♥️🤗 #sciencenerds #geneticcounselor #astronomer #familytime #familyfun #experiments #athomescience #makingconnections #momentsofmagic #craeatingmemories

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#gratitudechallenge
Day 6: Humor and humility

I shared this story on my personal page. Today, for about an hour, I thought my phone was dead. 🙈

It went on after having been plugged in overnight. But then, while I was typing in my unlock code, the screen went black and it wouldn't go back on.
I searched the internet to troubleshoot, I called customer service. I kept seeing/hearing the same thing: it's not an uncommon problem. Probably the other board. Send it back for repair/replacement which would take 7-21 days. 😱

I got out an old flip phone and went to change the SIM card and prepared to take the phone to the post office to mail.
And, I discovered that the cord wasn't plugged into the wall. The cables were so mixed up that I saw a USB plugged in and just assumed it was my phone's.
The phone had never charged!

Problem solved.
When I told my boys what had happened, they burst out laughing. And I laughed. I shared it on my personal page and everyone laughed.
I'm so grateful that I can laugh at myself and laugh with others when I do something incredibly stupid. It's so easy to get caught up in the moment and to jump to the worst conclusions.

But, when you can laugh, your body releases chemicals that not only reduce stress but also have been shown to dilate blood vessels, thus increasing blood flow, and a whole slew of other medical benefits.
So, today, Day 6 of my gratitude challenge. I'm grateful for #laughter!

How about you? What made you laugh today?

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When I fix something that is broken in the house, my first thought is: Why don't I do this professionally?! 😂

It's a serious ego boost!
I'm old enough to remember when it wasn't so easy to get instructions - let alone ones that are easy to understand - for DIY repairs.
You had to go the library, look up the book in the card catalog (shout out to the Dewey decimal system!), and then go search the shelves and hope no one else had taken it out already.

I'm not complaining. To be honest, I love the library and am also grateful that we have one within walking distance for French books and an online one for English books!
But, I'm also super grateful that I live in an age where I can look up how-to do things like fix the washing machine or a car seat belt or plumbing - and order the necessary parts - while in my PJs. 😎

#gratitudechallenge #day5 #DIYrepairs

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Another #latergram because it turns out I forgot to post my #gratitudechallenge day 3.

I am so grateful for all of the amazing people who have supported me and my business(es) over the years.
If you had told me when I was in genetic counseling school that we'd be living in France and that I'd be teaching kids yoga and helping coach busy moms how to create more joy and ease in their lives, I'd have told you you were crazy!
Life is unpredictable and that makes it scary and uncomfortable but also so fun and rewarding!

So many of you stood beside and encouraged me! Listened to my fears and let me shed tears. I truly find myself in awe of all the people that are in my life!
Last year, when I was going through the gratitude challenge, I created a printable to use in my yoga classes to teach kids about connecting with their gratitude.
But, I find that I love it just as much as they do and I want you to have it too. You can download it here (no sign-ups, 1000% free): https://marisaraymond.com/free-gratitude-printable/

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#gratitudechallenge day 4: I'm so grateful that I live in a place with seasons. Probably because it's what I grew up with so it just feels normal.
But, there's something about seeing the leaves change color and fall to the ground that feels magical. Like Nature is reminding me that things are always changing and to embrace it all.

Looking at these leaves that are on the grounds of the school where I teach just makes me feel present and joyful. ♥️🙏 🍁🍃🍂

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I try to unplug as much as possible on the weekends so I missed my post for the #gratitudechallenge day 2 here.

On November 2, I am grateful for my health.
I spent the afternoon visiting a colleague and friend who is in the hospital recovering from a serious car accident.
The accident wasn't his fault. He was in the wrong place at the wrong time. And while he will recover fully, it will be a long and arduous journey.
Sitting with him and then walking around the hospital, there are so many people who, through no fault of their own, face immense health difficulties.
As a genetic counselor, I worked with many families who we're on first name basis with the hospital staff.

When we're young, we often take our health and mortality for granted. But as I get older, I've become so much in awe of how the body heals and how lucky we are when we can say that we're healthy.
So, today, I'm grateful for my health.
And, I send love and light to those who are facing health challenges. May you be surrounded by carers and health professionals who are compassionate, competent, and kind. 🙏

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We're back in France and it's NOVEMBER!! Every November, I like to recommit myself to a gratitude practice.

Research studies have shown that practicing gratitude:
✅ can lead to improved physical and psychological health
✅ can help reduce stress and overcome trauma
✅ can improve sleep
✅ can reduce aggression and increase empathy

All from taking 5 minutes a day to write out or say out loud: "Today, I am grateful for...." Want to join me?

What are you grateful for today, November 1, 2019?

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10 years ago and today. Arriving home to France.
What we expected to be a short adventure has turned into an unexpected expat life filled with new friends, magical memories, and bilingualism.
This is not at all how or where I imagined my life was going to be. But I'm so grateful for this experience.

I miss living in the US so much but I also know that living in France has given us opportunities to grow together as individuals and as a family.

Plus, delicious chocolatine/pain au chocolat to welcome us home.

Happy Franciversary to us!

#expatlife
#homefromholidays
#fbf

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Last morning stateside. We're back in Miami and flying home tonight.
Couldn't miss this opportunity to do my morning yoga with a view while everyone else sleeps in after staying up late last night to watch game 7.

Listening to the birds and the ocean, I cannot help but be filled with gratitude and love.
These moments are when I know that the days of hard work and moments of reals challenges are worth it.
Life is not always a sunny view but that's what makes the sunny views all that more special.
To truly appreciate the good, we have to accept the shit. They are two sides of the same coin. And they both are necessary for our growth.

#momentsofmagic #vacationmode #lastday #grateful #familytime #itsnotalwayseasybutitsworthit #mindfulness #selfcaretime #coachinglife

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The hotel is having a pumpkin carving contest!
#Halloween season in the US is the best!

#expatlife #homevisit #vacationmode

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